FUUUCKER dates as much as MALESCORPIO and some people want to know HOW is he doing this?
It is estimated that all the years he lived in a rent free garage he saved a fortune. Coincidentally he owes his wife a fortune.
So far, in an attempt to help recover/locate the hidden money -which is owed to his wife- chat operatives have searched Fuuuuuckers place and so far nothing has been turned up. The search is not over! Check off these locations on your list of potential hiding spots in Fuuuuckers place and help us continue on in the recovery effort.
1. In an envelope taped to the bottom of a kitchen shelf (NOTHING RECOVERED)
2. In a watertight plastic bottle or jar in the tank on the back of fuuuucker's toilet (NOTHING RECOVERED)
3. In an envelope at the bottom of the lawn chair that doubles as Fuuuuuckers bed. (NOTHING RECOVERED)
4. In a plastic baggie in the freezer (NOTHING RECOVERED)
5. Inside of an old sock in the bottom of his dirty magazines drawer (NOTHING RECOVERED)
6. In an empty Viagra bottle in the bathroom (NOTHING OTHER THAN ROLLED JOINTS RECOVERED)
7. In the pocket of a particular Disco shirt in his closet (NOTHING OTHER THAN A CONDOM FROM 1980 RECOVERED)
8. In a folder labeled 'Jess's owed money' in his filing cabinet (NOTHING OTHER THAN COUPONS AND KOHL's CASH RECOVERED)
9. At the bottom of a cat’s litter box (NOTHING EXCEPT WOMEN'S UNDERWEAR WHICH HE SELLS ON EBAY RECOVERED)
10. Taped to the back of a wall decoration (NOTHING RECOVERED)
11. In between several pages in a random book or two on his bookshelf (He doesn't read books NOTHING RECOVERED)
12. Buried in a jar in the back yard (NOTHING BUT SCREEN CAPTURES OF EBUNNY RECOVERED)
13. In an envelope in the glove compartment of his car (NOTHING BUT JESS'S INSURANCE & REGISTRATION RECOVERED)
14. Underneath a potted plant (or even buried in a small jar in the soil) (NOTHING BUT A FEW VIAGRA PILLS RECOVERED)
15. In an envelope taped to the bottom of a dresser drawer (so he can reach it from the inside of the dresser below it) (NOTHING BUT PRINT OUTS OF SCREEN CAPTURES RECOVERED)
16. Inside of a big coffee cup in the back of a cupboard (NOTHING BUT A PIECE OF SCRAP PAPER WITH DIRECTIONS TO A PARENT WITHOUT PARTNERS DANCE RECOVERED)
20. In a DVD case (NOTHING BUT MIDGET PORN RECOVERED)